The Art of Saying Nothing
For a while now, I’ve want to to call Obama on his utter inability to make a concrete statement on anything. If you parse his words carefully, you will find that, far more often than not, he is saying nothing at all while giving the right people some sort of comfort. Yesterday’s response to the situation at Republic Windows is classic (my comments in bold):
OBAMA: When it comes to the situation here in Chicago with the workers who are asking for the benefits and payments that they have earned, I think they’re absolutely right. [Who could argue with that. People are asking for what they have "earned." By definition, everyone is entitled to what they have earned. That's what we mean by using the word "earned." Watch for the "if-then" later]. And understand that what’s happening to them is reflective of what’s happening across this economy. [First step, blur the lines. Make sure that, when the schnitzel hits the spritzer, you can claim that you weren't talking about Republic, but more generally about the broader economy.] When you have a financial system that is shaky, credit contracts; businesses large and small start cutting back on their plants, and equipment and their workforces. And so that’s why it’s so important for us to maintain a strong financial system. [This all sounds eminently reasonable, but is anyone arguing that we should not maintain a strong financial system? In the words of Melvin Udall, "I'm drowning here, and you're describing the water!"]
But, it’s also important for us to make sure that the plans and programs that we design aren’t just targeted at maintaining the solvency of banks, that they’re designed also to get money out the door and to help people on Main Street. [This is classic Obama: set up the two sides, and feel their pain: workers need money, banks need to stay solvent. Then propose that we make everyone happy by: "making sure that the plans and programs that we design" make everyone happy. There's no there there.] So, number one, I think that these workers, if they have earned these benefits and their pay, then these companies need to follow through on those commitments. [BINGO! Who had the "if-then" in the middle of the second stanza? Come on up to claim your prize. To be clear, Obama is only saying that if the workers earned benefits, then the companies should follow through. First, a non Turing-compliant computer could make that statement. There are no facts, no judgments and no conclusions. Just a hypothetical. Second, I'm sure that even the business owners would like to "follow through on those commitments", but being broke means you cannot follow through on financial commitments. In law, this is known as fighting the facts: if you're given a tough decision, change the facts with your magical oratory wand. You know that riddle with the fox, the duck and the grain? Obama would say, "I think we need to devise a plan that would allow the fox, the duck and grain to make it across the river safely. We would work with local and state agencies to ensure that the river was navigable and..." Completely avoids the issue, but sounds good. ] And, number two, I think it is important for us to make sure that, moving forward, any economic plan that we put in place helps businesses to meet payroll [again, state the obvious: I want to make everyone happy--but I won't tell you how] so that we’re not seeing these kinds of circumstances again.
And one of the things I’ve asked my economic team to review is [I love this technique as well. He used this all weekend with Tom Brokaw, "I've asked my economic/security/broken promises team to review..." It's Clintonian in it's lack of commitment. Obama can always say "well, they reviewed it, and the answer was, 'Yes, we were doing everything we could!' Problem solved."]: Have we done everything that we can to make sure that credit is flowing to businesses, [ooh, that's good- businesses need money to pay for economic benefits of their workers! Forget making a profit. Now get ready for the rainbow unicorn wishlist...] and to families [who could argue with helping families? Workers have families.], and to students who are trying to get loans [okay, a bit off topic, but I see where this is going...], and homeowners [DING DING DING! Lefty trifecta in the third stanza! We've got unions, education and minority home ownership! Obama has managed to loop in all but one of the liberal darlings. Leaving out the environmentalists was not too bad, but you could've worked in a green agenda point by noting that Republic makes energy efficient windows. (Who knows or cares if they actually do-the media won't be checking). Try that next time!] who have been making their payments on their homes but are still finding their properties’ values so depressed that it becomes very difficult for them to make their mortgage payments? [Wait- what? Since when does your mortgage payment change based on your home's value? If you buy a house for $250,000, the interest may fluctuate if you have and ARM, but it's irrelevant that your home is worth $300,000 or $150,000. Interest rates are not directly tied to property values, and most people have been able to refinance to get out the ARM (on the demand of Congress). The only way property values matter is if you only bought the home assuming the prices had to go up, and planned on flipping it. Once again, personal accountability rears its ugly head.] That’s where the rubber hits the road and that’s going to be the central focus of my administration. [Now wrap it all up by saying this problem is the central focus of my administration]. Okay.
Now here’s a quick reading comprehension quiz:
To solve this problem, President Obama will:
(a) ask his economic team to review whether or not we’ve been doing all we can to fix this problem. (Lemme get back to ya.)
(b) continue to work for families like these and others across the nation that are feeling these difficult economic times. (Empathy tonic)
(c) make sure that we create a plan that allows credit to flow to all companies that need it, regardless of their financial circumstances or ability to repay, while still making sure that banks are able to remain solvent. (Magic beans).
(d) I have no clue, the man didn’t say a damn thing, and neither did a-c.