. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Daily Danet Broken News Ticker  Quote of the Moment: "I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer." — Douglas Adams  Click Here for More Broken News  TPM whines about a potential govt shutdown: Think of the bureaucrats! Won't someone please think of the bureaucrats!  3 out of 4 candidates in MA governor's race promise to honor voter's will on taxes. The fourth is the sitting governor.  Australian MP and Reverend Fred Nile caught with pr0n, blames research in Australian Sex Party. Suuuure.  Rosey Romer: The stimulus failed. Our only hope is more spending and less taxes. At least she is half right.  Don't Mess with Texas: They now have deep-fried beer. Bud Heavy? MGD Fatso? Red Stroke?  Katie Couric: I can see the end of my career from my house.  Was Obama presidential last night, as he downplayed success and emphasized costs? He was presidential enough.  Ed Schultz says he could draw 300,000 people to the Mall just as easily as Beck. He can barely get that many people to watch his show from the comfort of their own homes.  Just in case you forgot, Professor Obama thought the surge would backfire.  Despite record majorities for his party in Congress, Obama whines about Republicans obstructing his socialist agenda.  Click Here for More Broken News  Quote of the Moment: "Only those who attempt the absurd will achieve the impossible." - M. C. Escher  Daily Danet is not suitable for bear attack.  . . . . . . . .

Broken News

Thursday, September 2nd

TPM whines about a potential govt shutdown: Think of the bureaucrats! Won't someone please think of the bureaucrats!
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3 out of 4 candidates in MA governor's race promise to honor voter's will on taxes. The fourth is the sitting governor.
Comment


Australian MP and Reverend Fred Nile caught with pr0n, blames research in Australian Sex Party. Suuuure.
Comment


Rosey Romer: The stimulus failed.  Our only hope is more spending and less taxes. At least she is half right.
Comment

Wednesday, September 1st

Don't Mess with Texas: They now have deep-fried beer. Bud Heavy? MGD Fatso? Red Stroke?
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Katie Couric: I can see the end of my career from my house.
Comment


Was Obama presidential last night, as he downplayed success and emphasized costs? He was presidential enough.
Comment


Ed Schultz says he could draw 300,000 people to the Mall just as easily as Beck. He can barely get that many people to watch his show from the comfort of their own homes.
Comment

Tuesday, August 31st

Just in case you forgot, Professor Obama thought the surge would backfire.
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Despite record majorities for his party in Congress, Obama whines about Republicans obstructing his socialist agenda.
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7 out of top 10 wealthiest in Congress are Democrats. Someone's faulty premise is showing.
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Lily white media calling the Tea Party pot white.
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Newsweek questions Obama's legitimacy. By accident.
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CBO: Iraq war cost less than stimulus.  Plus, it saved or created 31 million free Iraqis.
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Obama to Call Bush Before Iraq Speech; will lecture Bush on how his policies nearly cost us victory.
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Obama policies a certainly a change: Release terrorists and provide 'Reeducation' for citizens.
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Majority of our military are racist; anxious; cling to guns, religion and antipathy to those not like them.
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Monday, August 30th

Mormon bishop fatally shot in California. Why is the media not blaming gay rights activists?
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Sacred: pertaining to or connected with religion. Moron: See Bill Press.
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Obama: I can't spend all my time with my birth certificate plastered on my forehead. Where would I put the Bush Did It sign?
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Obama: Hey, you're never gonna believe who is really responsible for my mess.
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Matthews and Maddow call a blogger racist for his DC travel advice. Bonus: Blogger is a Dem donor. D'oh!
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Letting the Bed Bugs Bite: EPA's senseless ban of DDT now literally a pain in the ass.
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Obama: Who's got two thumbs and single handedly saved Iraq? THIS guy!
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Obama responds to questions on his faith with whine about birth certificate. Guess we know why he never released it.
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Obama to apologize to Iraq for invading; toppling dictatorship and imposing Democracy on those who would rather have oppression.
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Beck rally degenerates into riot as screams of "Play Loser!" go unheaded.
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More flip flops than Disney World: Charlie Crist was in favor of Charlie Crist before he was against him.
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About the Daily Danet

The Daily Danet
The Daily Danet (like “Planet,” but with a Dan instead of a Plan) is an online (sometimes) satirical newspaper published online by Daily Danet LLC, a New York limited liability company. The Editor in Chief (and sole author) of the Daily Danet is Dan Conlon.*

Most reports will be satirical in nature and will fall into one of the Daily Danet’s sections, such as Business, Science, U.S.,  etc.  On occasion, the editors will receive reports with a byline from the past (or future). These will be filed under “Today in History.”

The Daily Danet website is composed of Broken News™ and original content.  The original content consists of analysis, opinion and advice on all sorts of topics, with special focus on politics, Global Warming™ and, recently, healthcare (as well as health care).  Broken News™ is a daily collection of funny, serious, smarmy or otherwise interesting links, as filtered through the Daily Danet Sieve of Knowledge™ (patent pending).  Broken News can be view in the ticker, on the center side-bar, both of which provide the most recent posts, or on the Broken News category page.  Clicking on the “Comment” link on the center side-bar will take you to the permalink where you can discuss the news item and see any embedded video without leaving the friendly confines of the Danet website.

The Sieve of Knowledge
All postings are processed through the Sieve of Knowledge.  The Sieve of Knowledge is 1.7 kg bio-mechanical computing device developed and programmed by some of the world’s finest scientists, educators and legal scholars at Texas A&M University, The University at Stony Brook, The University of Arizona, St. John’s University School of Law, Brookhaven National Laboratories, Lawrence Livermore National Laboratories, NASA Langley Research Center and other fine institutions of science, research, higher learning and capitalism.

The Sieve of Knowledge was originally designed to run on a mix of carbonated high fructose corn syrup combined with partially hydrogenated vegetable shortening. Due to bio-mechanical aging and mass aggregation, the Sieve of Knowledge 2.0 runs on celery, carrots, whey protein and the best stuff on Earth with aspartame.

Dan Conlon
Dan received a Bachelor of Science in Physics from Stony Brook; a Masters of Science in Atmospheric Sciences from the University of Arizona and a Juris Doctor from St. John’s University School of Law.  Dan has worked for NASA, the federal government, major corporations and two of the most prestigious law firms in the world, where he strove to keep America safe for billionaires.  Dan currently works in a law department for an S&P 500 corporation in the financial services industry.

Dan’s politics are more conservative than liberal, and more libertarian than Republican.  Dan is a mix of Ayn Rand’s views on the economy, Ronald Reagan’s foreign and military policy and Sam Kinison’s calm, rational demeanor.

Dan lives and works in New York with his lovely wife, Nina, and their beloved dog, Sedona Schnebly.

*Not his real surname, but a close facsimile.

To contact Dan, email him at: email


2 Responses to “About the Daily Danet”

  1. Dan,

    I’ve been following your blog for a while and I just wanted to let you know that it’s nice to find a kindred spirit. I’ve always been a huge fan of Ayn Rand and Sam Kinison. I just added you to my blogroll, and I’ve encouraged a couple of other folks to do the same. I’m exploring the possibility of creating a small network of like minded bloggers to help us all attract a larger audience. Let me know if you’re interested.

    Chris

    #48
  2. Greg Danet

    Interesting name for your blog.

    #49

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